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Remember homeboy from last week who said he ain't never gonna run to the bus???
He wasn't lying....Guess who was walking to the bus stop this morning and showed no interest in running?....Take a guess who got left behind?

Who let the Goats Out?!?

Two things....
When I made it to a normal bus stop this morning one student got on like she should.
Another student who was a real pain in the ass last year was walking. For some reason something came over me and I decided to wait for mr. slow poke to get on the bus. I don't know what came over me, I normally wouldn't wait like this. What the heck was I thinking???
So homeboy finally makes it to the bus door and as he's walking up the steps I say to him, "You need to run next time"
Homeslice mouths off to me and laughs right at me and says, "I ain't never gonna run to the bus."
I took this as a challenge to see how many times I can leave him starting tomorrow till the end of the year.
That's what I get for waiting on him....stay tuned and see if he gets left by the end of the week.

I think this is funny and I don't know why. Animals in places they shouldn't be makes me laugh. If someone lets a stray dog into the mall and you see that dog walking around inside Spencers gifts or Orange Julius that is hilarious to me...Again, I don't know why.
So anyway, yesterday I'm cruising down the highway. It's only 6:30 in the morning so it's still dark. Hardly any traffic on the road I'm driving down. Just a calm, quiet morning. All of a sudden I hear on the radio this conversation which from reading the above you should know I thought was freakin' funny for some reason...
"Bus twenny nine to west"
"This is west go ahead"
"Thays a billie goat runnin' downs the road ova here where I be"

Play cricket sound in your head for about 10 seconds because the radio was silent. I think dispatch was either laughing or trying to figure out what to do or both.

"Is the goat on the side of the road or what's he doing?"
"Naw, he be runnin' down the road, he might b one uv dem ffa goats and got loose, u might wants to cawl da po-lice"
By now I'm rolling and already have the mic in my hand so that I can clown a little.
"Ok we'll call the police and let them know"
I get on the mic and do my best impression of a goat.
Without missing a beat someone else picks up their mic and says "Sounds like that goat already got on somebodys elses bus!'
So there you have it, I thought it was funny, but maybe you had to be there.
Bus 13 Clear

Take it to the bank folks...

Let me give some of you parents some shocking news. Your kids act up when you are not around.
Yes! It is true..
So when I tell you that your kid was standing up on the bus while the bus was moving try not to act like you just saw an alien.

To the High School kids that ride my bus. This is the 4th week of school. You should by now know what time I arrive in the morning. From now on I will leave you, even if I see you running for the bus. I love doing that! I might even make eye contact and wave bye. If the other students see you running for the bus I will ask them to wave also. To the student that I saw this morning, yes I saw you running and I also saw you again at an unauthorized stop trying to wave me down. Don't worry I saw you, but we aren't allowed to make unauthorized stops because of liablitly reasons. I love this rule because it gives me an out for not stopping and instead driving on by and smiling. :-)

Johnny Law

One thing that amazes me, or shocks me I suppose is the presence of police at schools these days.
I tried to remember at least one time when I remember cops being at school when I was growing up. The only time I can remember is in kindergarten when my Dad came to talk to us. That's it.
Everyday on campus I see cops, not rent-a-cops but real cops carrying guns. I understand why they are there, but where are we at in society that we need the fuzz at middle school and high schools every day?
Leaving the High School today I counted 4 cop cars in different locations just monitoring everything that was going on. More of a "just in case" I suppose.
I wonder if we will ever see cops at the elementary schools. I would imagine in some parts of the country, ie. California, they are already there.
Bus 13 Clear

What I saw...

Minding my own business this morning and picking up the High School kids. I'm driving thru this neighborhood and look over to see two people rolling a body out of the house on a stretcher with a blanket over the body. They were loading the body into a hearse.

Everything else has been pretty normal. Still hot as hell out there in the afternoons. The mornings aren't so bad, but the afternoons.....wow, scorching.
Bus 13 Clear

The Incident

My wife reminded me of another story from last year...

A fellow driver had switched routes in order to get more hours in a work day. The route she took would mean that she would become a multi-route driver. Basically a fill in driver that drives the routes of drivers who call in sick or are on vacation. We used to drive the same elementary and middle school routes until she switched over to the multiroute routes. The point is I hadn't talked to her in a couple of weeks because we were always in different parts of the district.

I ran into her outside in the parking lot and asked her how she liked her new position.
She told me it was great except for that incident the other day. Not knowing what the "incident" was I just kind of skipped over that comment without thinking about it. We talked about the things she liked and disliked about the new position as a multiroute driver. She told me again that she thought she was going to really like it as long as she didn't have another incident like the one the other day.

Now since this was her second time mentioning "the incident" a light bulb went off in my head that made me think either she wanted to tell me about "the incident" or she assumed I already knew about it.

Ladies and Gentlemen I present "The Incident"
Now curious about the incident I asked what she was talking about....
She proceeded to tell me that as she was pulling up to a bus stop the other morning that there seemed to be a commotion.(sp?)
She said that one young man who was a middle schooler was chasing around the other kids. The other kids were all laughing and screaming as she pulled up to the stop. The boy chasing everyone jumped to the front of the line, cutting in front of everyone. As the bus driver opened the door the boy turned sideways, wearing sweatpants, and pointed to his "crank" and said "hey bus driver, check this out!"
Horrified, she didn't really know what to say so she told him to sit down and be quiet. The boy then said, "It won't go down either!"

All the way to school, about a 15 minute ride, everyone was screaming and hollering as this boy continued to show off his manhood thru his sweatpants.
She got on the two way radio and asked a principal to meet her out front when she arrived.
When she arrived at the school 15 minutes later the principal came to the bus and asked her what the problem was. Still not knowing what to say she called the boy up to the front of the bus for the principal to see for himself.
The principal didn't say another word, told the boy to follow him and then went inside.

The next day the principal informed the driver that the boy had gotten into his dad's Viagra just to "see what would happen"

I was laughing as the driver told this story, sadly she still looked horrified. I have no idea what I would have done in that situation. What could you do? What could you say? "Hey You're going to have to put that in your backpack while we ride to school."

Maybe she should have waited until he was getting on the bus and closed the door on his "junk"

Another true story, I couldn't make this stuff up.....

Bus 13 Clear